Se La Vie

Said the old folks. It goes to show you never can tell. I'd have expected more discussion and debate on that last post, but oh wells.

I apologize for the eratic posting schedule and varying lengths. I have two internships and a full course load, so I do this whenever I have time. It also means I'm not responding to comments every time, which I'd like to. Nor have I been wholly sucessful in going through everyone's profiles, checking to see what blogs they read etc. It's still a small group and with a lot of represented authors, others seeking representation, and, I think, a couple other assistants at agencies. So I'd encourage you all to look at each other's profiles before the numbers become overwhelming (see that stampede of people just begging me to keep ranting and raving?). Never know. You might make a good connection or lead each other to interesting sources.

I also encourage you to play word association with your friends over Gmail just to see what sorts of crazy ads pop up on the side. It's more fun than an oversized barrel full of genetically enhanced humor monkies. And it probably messes with Google's head a little bit. Speaking of monkies, the only reason I can post at all considering my busy schedule is thanks to the aid of two of my good friends and pet projects, Eduardo the Thesis monkey (It's like a Rhesus monkey, but with less peanut butter and more brains)and Travis the Howler Monkey. Ed writes many of my school papers and outlines some blog posts (the good ones) while Travis is my public body double. I can be in two places at once! But I'll talk about them more at a later date.

Today's quick tip- Don't steal names. Seriously. You have no idea how much that annoys me. I can't catch every single one because it's not like I've read every book, seen every movie, etc. but it can be a deal killer all by itself. And it's usually accompanied by other thievery. Example, once I got a query for a murder mystery following a hard boiled female cop in NY out for revenge on her mother's killer. Her name was Nikki Beckett. Because apparently the author thinks that there's no chance I ever saw an episode of "Castle": a TV show about a murder mystery writer who shadows exactly such a woman and writes about her when he's not assisting on her cases. The character in Castle is named Kate Beckett, and in the books within the show, her alter ego is Nikki Heat. Ergo, Nikki Beckett. I mean, Christ. Could they have tried? Another example. A YA Paranormal that opens with a beautiful girl named Claire displaying her newfound super powers to her normal best friend Zach. Because that writer must have thought that although millions of people have seen the first season of heroes, there wasn't a pretty good chance that I had. What. The. Hell? Moral here is quick and easy: Don't do it. I don't care if the names are just place holders, I don't want to see it. Hammer that out before you bring it to a professional or you'll likely be tossed the second they figure it out. Referencing, parody, that's fine. But what those authors were doing was A) writing drivel and B) writing drivel that could get you sued for copyright infringement if the manuscript ever saw the light of day. And if you get it past me,don't celebrate. There's still other people at the agency. And then editors. And then sales staff and marketers and publicity and copy editors and reviewers. All it takes is one person to notice and you'll have slit your own throat. No one will touch your writing again. You think it'd be better if it got published before anyone sees it? Then you'll never publish again, AND you'll be facing litigation. So remember kids, winners don't do drugs. Or, um. Steal.